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All That I Am

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All That I Am

COSMIC HEADPIECE Ascension Of Reason original painting by Robert G. Kernodle, inspired by a Burne Hogarth human anatomy drawing, MATERIALS-art acrylics on gallery-wrap stretched canvas, DIMENSIONS-36" x 60", YEAR-circa 2000.


I cannot know for certain what came before me. What I do know, however, is that my existence is sufficient justification to value my thoughts, because why would material substance ascend to conceptual awareness, if conceptual awareness had no benefit for the material substance from which it originated?

What I think, then, is that all life, ... all things, in fact, arise from the depths of a cosmic ocean -- an ocean so deep that no consciousness can encompass it. No mind can grasp it. Consequently, the human mind must get a fix upon itself by comparing its limited boundaries of conception to its greater expanses of perception.

Perception And Conception

Sensory perception exceeds mental conception, while containing it as well. In other words, perception transcends and includes conception, even though many people believe that this relationship is the other way around. Perception, in its boundless freedom, defines the mind, as a sea defines an island or as a pond defines a fallen leaf. Such watery masses act as malleable backgrounds against which the seemingly bounded shapes of islands and leaves gain figurative meanings.

I am, then, a sort of island or a leaf in the greater sea of eternity. I arose from the primal anatomy of all life, which came from the Earth's fluid oceans, which came from the Universe's sub-quantum, super-fluid sea. Nobody can know for certain whether such successive, recursive encasements ever end or even begin. Since I trust my mind's reflections, I trust my sense of harmony in the idea that such successive, recursive encasements never end and never ultimately begin.

Infinity And Eternity

I suggest, therefore, that we humans are best to think of infinity and eternity in these literal fluid terms, so that we might find shared harmony in shared ideas about how our individual physical forms float for a while and eventually re-dissolve into reality's whole.

Earth’s watery oceans were born of cosmic water-like plasma, and these oceans eventually echoed fluid’s most minute structure-building characteristics (by way of dynamic fluid turbulence), producing a symphony of cellular compartmentalization, membrane interfacing, organic agglomeration, and systemic accumulation. This symphony of life continued until a curious form emerged that walked upright on bony stilts inside a strangely symmetrical watery, fleshy sack.

All that I am, therefore, is this watery sack on bony stilts, strolling about a blue globe, hurtling about its colossal fluid cousin Sun, in turn hurtling about its even more distant relative fluid galactic center. All that I am in this universe is less than an insect, … even less than the least amount I can imagine. I am nothing. Yet I perceive that I am.

Purpose And Meaning

I exist, and this accounts for something. It accounts for a meaning in an otherwise meaningless, eternal plastic flow. The meaning of my being is motion, … peak patterning, … and then dissipating, decaying, and dying, which fabricates the raw materials for new living . The meaning of life is established in death, and the meaning of death is established in life. Again the island/ocean, leaf/pond analogies apply. We know the most, when we accept that we die.

All that I am is death recycled, … breath re-filtered, … atoms rearranged, and old thoughts newly refined. What’s the point? There is no point. Points are dots, and nothing in life-death-life is so confined. Dots (thus points) are pointless ways to conceive of purpose and meaning. Instead, purpose and meaning flow from movement of substance that never ceases. All that I am ultimately is substance-motion unceasing. I am a peak realization whose total body exceeds its watery, fleshy bounds, just as a ripple from a raindrop exceeds the raindrop’s primary mass.

My existence has ripples in a much grander puddle. I ripple through all other beings, and all other beings ripple through me. All that I am is the universe, where my being here-and-now is just a raindrop.